I'd like a Side Order of Wisdom Please

Wow I am exhausted but wired. My brain is just racing. I was a the EX with Cheryl tonight (from work), it was fun and I went on some of the scary rides. One that went upside down and it wasn’t that bad! And I went out for Ice cream last night. Other than that I’ve just been working and it seems to be my weekends are always jam packed with seeing my friends and such. I’m sooo tired. And I really want to make time for me and God. I want wisdom. And that’s exactly what I’m going to pray for, surprise, surprise.

I’ve been thinking so much lately (maybe it’s good for me hey?, lol) The big things is how do I tell people about God and His Son Jesus Christ? And how much he loves them? It’s been pressing on me lately because I’ve been around those who don’t know him for most of my hours I’m awake. And I just got to pray for wisdom and boldness. The time when to say it and the opportunity when they are ready to listen. Argghhhh!!!!! Why does this have to be so hard? I’m being stttreeetched right now. Always a good thing, I just don’t know how to take a huge step outside of my comfort zone. I don’t want to be a forcer. SO I am Extremely frustrated right now, with everything going through my head.
That’s all for now folks!
P.S. There have been positive things happening in my life though, God has been doing some things in me. :)

Life and.....Death

Death. Not the most inspirational topic. A topic we don’t think about a lot, try to ignore because it brings so much sadness. Until it smacks you in the face. Then you have to think about it. What made me bring this subject up?? I just watched this movie The Life of David Gale. Very intense movie and one that the ending was really a blow in the face. Wow. That’s all I can say. But it made me think about death. And the fact is, it’s going to happen to all of us. The question is, what if you knew you were going to die? The exact moment. Maybe something like leukemia, not as specific but you knew you were dying. But if you were on death row. You had done something wrong but you still knew the exact time you were going to die. What a depressing though? What if we knew the moment we were going to die? What would we do to change our life? What would we put first that we always said we would do later on? What would we say to those around us, those we love? Would we treat people with more dignity because we realize that everyone needs to be loved? What are we actually doing to people when we put them down or make fun of them or treat them different? Hate is a strong word isn’t it? Do you like the feeling of being hated? I look back at my day sometimes and regret things I’ve said or done…sometimes on my own and other’s not resisting the influence of other people. A Steven Curtis Chapman song says “I’m living the next five minutes, like these were my last five minutes, and after the next five minutes I’m starting all over again.” I know I would tell people I loved them at that they are important to me. And how much God loves them and desires to be in a relationship with them? Everyone just wants to have fun but when that’s all said and done what do you have left? How can I show people that there is so much meaning to life? That it is rich and not to be wasted away? All these questions and I don’t exactly have the answer. Maybe people think I’m crazy for believing in God so strongly and passionately. A faith in something I cannot see. But in my spirit I know He is there. I love life but I’m not afraid of death. Maybe seeing all the people in pain around me, maybe while I’m in the flesh missing them in advance, knowing while I’m here that I will not be a part of their lives anymore. But what comes next?? That I’m not afraid of. Just some questions and thoughts. That movie made me think really hard which is good.